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5 things you should never say to your child, have you stepped on the thunder?

Time:2022-11-27 22:39:45 source:psychiatricethics.com author:Emergency treatment Read:923次
5 things you should never say to your child, have you stepped on the thunder?

A good word warms three winters, and a bad word hurts the cold in June. A word from a parent can become the sunshine that warms a child's life, and it can also become a weapon without gunpowder. These few words that should not be said to children must be "rotten in the stomach", don't say to children again! Put negative labels on your children, "Why are you always like this, doing things frizzly?" "Why are you so timid? You don't say hello when you see uncles and aunts!" "Why are you so stupid? You do such a simple question wrong!" Driven by emotions, parents may label their children with various labels when they are excited, such as "idiots", "selfish ghosts" and "tricksters", and all kinds of negative words blurt out to their children; but you know what? Your short-tempered angry words may have an indelible impact on your child. When a person is labeled with a certain label, Ta will make self-impression management to make his behavior consistent with the label content, which is the "label effect". A simple negative evaluation, which can even be called "angry words", will plant the seeds of inferiority in the child's young heart, and will also give the child a strong psychological hint, so that the child will develop in the direction of this hint, Your negative comments will eventually become a "permanent label" that the child can't get rid of, intimidating the child, "Wait for your dad to come back and see how he treats you!" "If you do this again, get out immediately!" "This is the last warning to you. If you are not obedient, I will see how I will settle the account with you!" If parents often say this, they will make their children feel uneasy and fearful and lack a sense of security, which will lead to increasingly estranged and tense parent-child relationships. In addition, such intimidation and threats are mostly temporary words, and basically they will not actually be implemented. Then once such words are said too much, the children will no longer take their parents' words seriously and become more reckless. Make the child feel guilty "I'm all for your own good." "I paid so much for you" "Everything we do is for you." If you keep these words on your lips, it will not only increase the child's sense of burden, Let the child live in guilt, feel that he is a "burden" of his parents, and even learn to please his parents blindly in order to avoid guilt, and form a pleasing personality; Taking it for granted, it will be even more detrimental to future education. Perfunctory children "Baby, you're awesome!" "I'm busy, I'll talk about it later." "Don't ask me, ask your mom/dad." Praise should be methodical, not specific but not all, like "You really A general compliment like "Bang" will not play a role, and it will make the child feel "perfunctory"; the compliment should be specific to what the child has done, and praise in a targeted manner! Let the child experience the feeling of "doing good is pleasant", strengthen this behavior, and stick to the good performance. ▲ Click to see how to properly encourage your child When you agree to a child's request, be sure to turn the promise into reality. If you agree first and then turn around but forget or simply don’t want to do it, it will reduce your child’s trust in you too many times; you will even “hate” your parents from the bottom of your heart. When your child asks you a question or wants you to accompany him, don't use the excuse of being busy every time to dismiss the child casually. I hope that parents can take every request of their children seriously, and don't always perfunctory children. Belittling oneself or the other half "Mom and dad are not capable..." "Your dad is so outrageous, so lazy, throwing smelly socks everywhere." "Your mom is really too long-winded and annoying" "Most children's inferiority complex is induced by their parents." If parents can be firm, confident and optimistic, their children will also be confident in the future. If parents often show their inferiority complex in front of their children, they will also subtly infect their inferiority complexes to their children; if parents slander the other half and speak ill of the other half in front of their children, the children will be in a dilemma, and thus both parents will be in a dilemma. Dissatisfaction and even fear of intimacy in children. Adults know that: being mean and being humorous are two different things, being open-minded and being candid are two different things, being uneducated and being casual are two different things, being indifferent and being honest are two different things. When we know that what we say is right, we should stop using words to hurt children.

(责任编辑:Prevent anxiety)

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